It is my birthday month but since two consecutive years, it is one of the toughest months to deal with. Last year it was my pregnancy, early postpartum blue set up triggered by my mom's fracture. I am not sure how I survived through the phase, but this year it is more like a mini torture version of the same month. Amidst lockdown, which I do not mind to be honest and I do not have time to think about 'going out' and such fantasies, what is breaking my will is my work.
My work. Nature of projects. Intense pressure of getting revenue amidst covid-19. It is impossible to emerge as a winner with other overly time consuming responsibilities at home. But let me talk about, office. In my current office situation, I have one colleague and friend who is holding my hand and dragging me on the track, so that I dont give up. I literally work because she is there. and only because she is there. (Apart from my salary, obviously!) I do not even want to start cribbing about office politics and my ethics colliding like a nuclear bomb blast. I am about to resign - is what I tell myself every two hours and just dont.
Abby. Abby is 10 months old and no way I am compromising on the time I spend with him. I do all his work and of course, dont play as much as I would wish to but I make it a point to sing songs while making him eat, reading books to him, do some dance together etc. Sometimes I wonder, why did I take up the job? I have to do so many things with him at this point!
Get the point? I am into some weird zone called 'Decision Taking State'.
So, when I felt like blogging today, about my birthday. I thought of giving this background beforehand. And also, to note down in this place, how my average day tuned out to be a little special by my loved ones.
It was an amazing idea of my Sister-In-Law who managed to co-ordinate with our family and oh boy, it was good to know that so many people took time to wish me together in our zoom party! Infact, the Gajar Ka Halwa prepared by Kaki, which I consumed through the screen made a wild card entry in my dreams at night! I have to mention my crazy maternal family who also held a zoom party to wish me and then later on they tortured zoom with their nonstop laughing riots!
It was such a big change in the mood for me. We all are social human beings, after all!
I remember myself thinking at night about all these special things, and what I wanted to in my life. Some old from the pending wish list and some new. Perspectives have changed with age and with this disruptive situations of covid-19.
Peace of mind definitely was on top with some materialistic happiness. April, as usual is tough in my mind. May be just like me?
My work. Nature of projects. Intense pressure of getting revenue amidst covid-19. It is impossible to emerge as a winner with other overly time consuming responsibilities at home. But let me talk about, office. In my current office situation, I have one colleague and friend who is holding my hand and dragging me on the track, so that I dont give up. I literally work because she is there. and only because she is there. (Apart from my salary, obviously!) I do not even want to start cribbing about office politics and my ethics colliding like a nuclear bomb blast. I am about to resign - is what I tell myself every two hours and just dont.
Abby. Abby is 10 months old and no way I am compromising on the time I spend with him. I do all his work and of course, dont play as much as I would wish to but I make it a point to sing songs while making him eat, reading books to him, do some dance together etc. Sometimes I wonder, why did I take up the job? I have to do so many things with him at this point!
Get the point? I am into some weird zone called 'Decision Taking State'.
So, when I felt like blogging today, about my birthday. I thought of giving this background beforehand. And also, to note down in this place, how my average day tuned out to be a little special by my loved ones.
It was an amazing idea of my Sister-In-Law who managed to co-ordinate with our family and oh boy, it was good to know that so many people took time to wish me together in our zoom party! Infact, the Gajar Ka Halwa prepared by Kaki, which I consumed through the screen made a wild card entry in my dreams at night! I have to mention my crazy maternal family who also held a zoom party to wish me and then later on they tortured zoom with their nonstop laughing riots!
It was such a big change in the mood for me. We all are social human beings, after all!
I remember myself thinking at night about all these special things, and what I wanted to in my life. Some old from the pending wish list and some new. Perspectives have changed with age and with this disruptive situations of covid-19.
Peace of mind definitely was on top with some materialistic happiness. April, as usual is tough in my mind. May be just like me?
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