September 27, 2016

In Reality

Like 99.9% people around me say, I'm an extrovert.Well, in reality I am NOT. I wear a mask of some giggles- smiles and talkativeness.Well, I talk a lot but people seldom realize that I choose my audience very carefully. (Once I make them my own they become the victim of chattering!) I knew about this mask before but reading this book called 'Quiet' by Susain Bolt- I know myself better.

1. I do not like to talk all the time. I do float in with some dialogues here and there but when I crave for that me-time for myself-nothing else helps. Not even if Harvey Specter comes begging to me for a cup of coffee. I sometimes like to get into my shell and want to be there forever. It only means that there is a storm being cooked up inside my mind and I need that time to calm myself down.

2. Like what she said in the book, pseudo extroverts can chat online a lot. They face great difficulty in talking face to face, in fact they have pen pals sort of friends more than face to face ones. They cook up a thunder storm connecting with people online but when it comes to face all of them in real life- they just shrug their shoulders and avid the occurrence. Totally me.

3. I like to be with my family. I love being in a joint family thanks to my brought up but when it comes to difference of opinions or whispers behind my back or a virtual cage of rules-I feel like getting under the blanket forever.Such situations have come up with my own parents too.

4. I am an aggressive introvert. I have firm opinions about things I know. I can strongly put them forward. If some one gets offended by it and I come to know about it - my relationship with him/her goes through a bumpy road. Very very calm people have problems with me and I do have problems with them but then some of my best friends have such traits too. (Mr.ISB looks calm but he is aggressive when it comes to his opinions)

5. I like creating my own abode. My corner, my wardrobe, my room, my office table, my stationary,my kitchen- everything. I like to do it as per my own ideas. It is very difficult to adjust in others' area for me. I have adjusted well with my in-laws/my own parents but then where do things float without an underwater dive? I remember my mom horrified of five years old me- who refused to open the door of the cupboard containing her dolls for her cousin. The reason was clear - my cousin was a very destructive child and I was supremely possessive for my toys. I am still the same.I still get irritated when some one takes a pen out of my pen-stand and never puts it back,but some thirteen location changes and sharing flats with different breeds since 2009, I have become a bit softer on this side. But, crushing the dream of putting that one vintage side table or  making the room a bit wider by choosing light colors - still hurts.

6. I want to do everything which is not a team activity. Just like a true introvert. I would watch Netflix, I would paint, get into crafting, read voraciously, love working in the kitchen alone, clicking photos, blogging - everything but nothing which we do in a team. One of the reasons I am not good in any sports. Though I like to spend time doing such things with people whom I comfortable with. Example: Watching movies with Mr.ISB and my SIL; Craft with only (may be) Frock buddy N; Reading alone but again would love to have Mr.ISB around. More than three people together- I would secretly wish for an emergency putting me away from the group.

I'm still wondering how many more actual traits I have managed to hide from myself. Have you read this book? Ever felt you are not what people see you as?

September 20, 2016

Chai time Chitchat #3

Time is flying. As of now.Thanks to husband's home trip for ten days. I have been sneaking away my time to be with him before he leaves for another one month pilgrimage and so all other things I was doing for past ten days are on 'Hold'.And for a change this schedule-lover-punctual-person is loving it. What if my Kindle is open but I am talking to him- not reading. The painting is yet to start after thinking about how-to start for now zillion times in my mind. My getting up at 6 am, does not make me go for a run- because I finish normal organizing stuff, dive into my tea and end up doing nothing - before Mr.ISB gets up. The only me-time I continue to grab is to be in the open cafeteria we have in the office building - sipping my Chai -reading something for some twenty minutes.

Reading. I have recently bookmarked  this article  which talks about how today's second generation of metro cities in India are lacking independence, decision power, doing-your-own-stuff-on-your-own etc as they live with their parents while doing their same city jobs. While I am guilty of doing the same, I feel this article strikes the chord when it talks about  people at 35, who never went to study out or spent a few years on their own - behave like brats. They hardly can pour water in the glass for themselves, never manage their own meals, yell on mothers for things they have misplaced, don't even now how to manage electricians-plumbers-finances, can not operate any electric equipment at home. They do not fold their blanket on their own, they do not mop the table if they spill food, they feel the house remains clean automatically - because maids. And mind you, this is not about gender. I have seen girls who struggle to switch on a washing machine if their maids or mothers are not there. They enter home and demand for snacks as if the mother was just taking rest for the whole day at home. While I feel living separately before (while doing the job) or after wedding keeps the relationship healthier, I do not approve of parents living alone in ailing condition. I would not like to see them struggling to reach for the box of medicines on daily basis. Though this article points out at parent's privacy which I had never thought about. After living for so many years on their own- suddenly juggling with the mindset of next generation is difficult.More than that - generally people in India after 60 struggle to get sometime for themselves. In India some sets of old couples even don't know that it is okay to go for a two months vacation alone once kids are thirty- they always struggle to decide what actually they want. Life seems to be always a trade off between living with parents- not living with parents theories but I do feel- at least living separately for a couple of years would make youngsters a bit independent and less spoilt.

I have been painting as well for a while. I would rather say- I was trying to paint and doodle. I received this high value Amazon Gift card from one of my bro-buddies on Rakhi through which I purchased all the colors and art tools I ever wanted in my life. I do wanted to do a separate post on this but it seems today is the day to show off this newbie's creativity!The Abstract Ganpati is my first ever acrylic paint and I gifted it to my MIL on her birthday :-)

What are you up to guys?

September 15, 2016

Louder in my head, never said that

- Dude, you can not be so late for the office. Now, don't cry if you have to stay till Nine in the office.

- You would never make a mess on table because my friend, you never have to work with papers.

-  I am not going to care about how the cleaner cleaned the office. Unless it bothers me personally.

- No, I do not want to hear how magically he got cured  after he started fasting.

- I would do my share of work- you do not have to offer the help just because you are free. 

- You can't use any cloth to clean the glass table.A spray and a glass cleaning mop, both are must.

- Can we just switch the AC off or should I show my running nose in public?

- Oh wait, now when the PM made you realized how Plastic kills cows you have suddenly stopped using plastic bags?! When we said it is harmful for environment you never bothered! 

-  Boiling already filtered water wont make it germ-free. But,a good practice. 

-  Putting cleaned dustbin five steps away from the statue of God is sin but putting the same on the platform - fifteen centimeters away from the food being cooked on the kitchen platform is okay.Wow.

- You can not cry on slaughter of dogs in China when you enjoy your chicken every day. 

- My husband has no problem with my maiden surname, you should not get bothered too. You are not even an extended family.

- Wait, would you fast for a month with only milk for me?

-With diabetes you would observe Navratra! Last time you had to break the fast in the hospital.

-What is to be proud of the fact that your religion is the most ancient one in the world? Do I look like a cave man?

-Can we get a break from all the spiritual-religious discussion. I wanna break-free.

-I'm bored of whispers. You can say things loudly when I'm not there.

-I told you once, I do not like this product. Go ahead if you want to, anyway.

September 6, 2016

Chai Time Chit Chat #2

Last few days have been exhausting. With family members (not the husband) performing religious rituals and fasting, I being the only (after the husband) non-religious person in a way- took the responsibility of helping in domestic chores as much as possible. Talk about being Karma Yogi.

House hold chores are therapeutic in a way but just like anything in extremes is bad- the office work and the household stuff clashing in 24 hours like the war of Kurukshetra exhausted me. Though the feeling of helping my own people (so that they can do what they want to) has a different 'happy feeling. I so wish some relatives can understand the concept of being KarmaYogi as well.

Then came the long weekend and I dare not say it was boring. It had everything a weekend should have in- I ran, spent time with the husband who is now in the flight to his tri-monthly pilgrimage to Scandinavia, went to an outlet - the only outlet in Mumbai which serves cold brewed coffee which I loved with all my heart, I painted ,I slept off, I broke the malfunctioning lock of parents-in-law's room when my Mother-in-law got locked  just when she wanted to leave for a community ritual in the temple. I think it was one of the most satisfactory weekends I have celebrated. Not to forget the fight I had with Mr.ISB-which in itself is a ritual now. *Rolling eyes*

Moreover, I have been on a books' spree, which means I hardly watch anything on Netflix/tv. I have also started painting again (if one okayish and one bad painting counts) which brings peace from within. I also applied Mehendi on four little hands this festive season. After having the cold brewed coffee at The Pantry (Kalaghoda) I tried making the same with normal CCD coffee bean crushed -Quite easy and impressive though I still need to try more of these cold brew versions. Happiness can't be too expensive.

What do you say?!