I brewed the coffee from the machine dad has been gifted by his French friend.The fitness freak soul of mine subconsciously added Sugar Free in the coffee and stirred the whole mug with the spoon. With the same subconscious mind, just like a daily ritual I went out in the Garden Balcony.
My eyes were focused on the mug and my mind, went back to the conversation my dad and my aunt had the previous day. My aunt who is a doctor is trying to treat my stomach burning problem. Like all other health problems I have, this is also a psychosomatic disorder. In simple language it has to do with psychology or the stress level of the patient.
I started sipping my coffee and realized, how my thinking-too-much habit has resulted into health problems in last few months. It has reversed my state of mind from care free to gloomy. Why cant I control my mind? Why do I have to think and over analyse things? Even when I am blessed with world's best parents,family friends and of course an awesome life partner.
If I am going to fall deeper in to this dark well, I am going to be gripped by a kind of depression. May be just like my mother who suffers from hyper tension time to time. If I am going to suffer how will my own people smile?
I was the sun shine, I was their smile and now? They are worried about my health. It is me who has to be stronger, and I have to take care of them. Tough to digest but I am a big girl now.
With the empty coffee mug, I left the balcony and smiled at my mother," Mom, lets go out today?"
My eyes were focused on the mug and my mind, went back to the conversation my dad and my aunt had the previous day. My aunt who is a doctor is trying to treat my stomach burning problem. Like all other health problems I have, this is also a psychosomatic disorder. In simple language it has to do with psychology or the stress level of the patient.
I started sipping my coffee and realized, how my thinking-too-much habit has resulted into health problems in last few months. It has reversed my state of mind from care free to gloomy. Why cant I control my mind? Why do I have to think and over analyse things? Even when I am blessed with world's best parents,family friends and of course an awesome life partner.
If I am going to fall deeper in to this dark well, I am going to be gripped by a kind of depression. May be just like my mother who suffers from hyper tension time to time. If I am going to suffer how will my own people smile?
I was the sun shine, I was their smile and now? They are worried about my health. It is me who has to be stronger, and I have to take care of them. Tough to digest but I am a big girl now.
With the empty coffee mug, I left the balcony and smiled at my mother," Mom, lets go out today?"
main hoon na
ReplyDeleteI know :D
DeleteGood to find you back in blogging.
ReplyDeleteStill better that you gathered courage in both your hands and taken on the small problem head on!
Be the sun shine and the smile once again!