April 10, 2016

I for Inertia

By Definition Inertia is the tendency of the matter to remain unchanged. Isn't it a realty in us- human being? Resistance to change. Resistance to go out of the comfort zone or even resistance to feel?

I have a lot of it unlike people's idea of my super human flexibility I generally show at work? You know what, that is also nothing but the inertia of changing my assertive image at work which is actually nothing but only a sort of fear. People close to me know or have observed that I have inertia for super weird stuff apart from resistance to move out of comfort that cozy comfort zone.

The Inertia in me stops me from doing something really new which already has some bias in my mind. Once I fear/believe something, it is rarest of the rare event that I try it. Swimming or driving.

Then there is this inertia to feel something. Negative or positive. People seldom know this kind of inertia I posses. Generally too expressive about even the temperature change of one degree,I do get cold feet when over whelmed. Let me explain. I'm certainly too expressive and sensitive even when I try to show my stronger/rude face at work. I wait for good things to happen like nobody's business with excitement and it's share of nervousness too if the situation demands.But when the wait is over or the same good luck appears out of no where in front of me all I can feel and express is a deadly combination of numbness and inertia. I do get judged for being a snob many a times but I fail to over come the effect (rather no effect) of inertia.I just behave as if nothing happened.

This weekend was The-Fight-That-Inertia weekend. I was waiting for Mr.ISB's call since eternity and the feeling was getting intense due to it being the Sunday-not doing-anything-day. I wanted to talk about hundred things to him but when he called- I was speechless. I had nothing to talk. This generally does not happen with my talkative nature but it happened and it used to happen before many a times.

We also received a call from my favorite aunt with whom I talk like there is no tomorrow albeit via e-mails. I was super excited to talk to her as generally we are in office when my MIL and she call each other, but when I picked the receiver up to talk, I did not know what to converse with the same favorite aunt or even the uncle. I just replied as if the inertia is not there but there was a lot of it. I was smitten by my overwhelmed self. I was caught by that Inertia fellow.

Okay, I should also mention instances where I got out of inertia.Yes, Baking had taken the last bench in my life and I wanted to revive it since months. I guess,last time I baked something was in last May? Mumbai and Baking both were toying around with my mood to bake even a cake. That was inertia of getting out of my schedule, put up that baking equipment in front of me, find an exciting recipe, buy required ingredients and just bake. Anyway, this weekend I made a move out and baked a super healthy cake with some Indian flavors.

I have many more inertia(S) to over come. The list includes swimming and driving but there are smaller but important ones as well.

Like expressing when it is really needed. For my special people.

A big sorry to all of them whom I really care about but fail to express the eagerness to be with them.

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